Showing posts with label freedom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label freedom. Show all posts

Saturday, March 15, 2008

The fluttering White curtains...

She got up from her bed, closed her eyes and waited for the song to start. As, the subtle beginning strains reached her ears, she raised her hands to feel his clasp them gently. He started by giving her body a gentle turn. She didn’t open her eyes, relying only on the sensations flowing between their bodies to synchronize their steps. The tempo of the song quickened and their dance paced to keep up. They were swirling in a smooth fluid whirlpool.

She felt herself being lifted, high up like a log on a wave crest, left twirling there for what seemed like an eternity, before being washed over to the beach down at his feet. One moment, he was the master, and she his trusting slave, following every command in his touch as she danced to his tune and the next second, she was the unforgiving mistress, driving him mercilessly to the tempo of her absolute ownership.

Her skirt billowed around her, like a fan in full motion as he whirled her out… then wrapped snugly around her legs like the closed petals of a virgin rose, as in one swift motion he twisted her body in.. his hands moving to her waist as her fingertips landed on his shoulders and her toe-tips on his.

The music softened midway and they moved slowly, moulded together. Then, her fingertips slipped over his rippling shoulders and her body moved away from him, but still joined to him by the toes. She let herself hang there, over the abyss, her head thrown back, her hair almost touching the ground, only his hands tightened over her wrists keeping her from going over. And then, in a jiffy, as the music reached its pitch, he had whipped her back from the edge, back into a moving flowing swimming universe.

Their bodies met like two liquids meeting in a mighty splash and then receded into their own corners in the aftermath, as the energy between them, rippled them apart. And then, she was again revolving faster than she ever had, her feet spinning out from her still toe tips. Her arms passed through his hold, like satin flowing out a hole.. till her fingertips met his and the electricity coursing through them, made hers swirl in their wake..

She felt his hand let go and for a moment her blind feet staggered uncertainly… then his hands were at her waist again and the confidence flowed back into her, as he spun her around like clay on a spinning wheel, till she rose gracefully to the crescendo, like an elegant pot rising from the bowl of mud… her hands clasped high above her head. Then, as the universe around them came to a boom and the rhythm crumbled into a million stars raining down, she too crumpled, just as beautifully, to her knees like a ballerina’s final bow, with his hands holding hers above the crown of her lowered head…

As the last strains of the music died, she rose slowly, uncreasing her sweaty pajamas and opened her eyes.. coming back to the empty room around her, still except for the plain white curtains fluttering gently at her window….

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

The Diver...


I looked across the rippling green sea, with something of a mixture of awe and dread.
After all, it was my first experience of deep sea diving, I didn't know what to expect below the slithering surface. My little boat rocked from side to side with each wave that broke against it. I stood under the hot sun watching it play with the sea, tripping its light on it and making it look like a beautiful green floor, on which buckets, of shining green emeralds and the whitest pearls, spilled and filled repeatedly. I was mesmerized to the degree that i did not hear my instructor screaming at me to get ready to jump.
As I put the oxygen mask over my face and got into my black and maroon diver's suit, I had this sudden feeling of being trapped. I had to fight a strong urge to peel that second skin off me and to remove that mask and throw it far across the waiting ocean.
I lowered my legs slowly into the ocean, it came lapping up for me, as if waiting hungrily for its latest morsel of food. It was an unnerving thought and didn't help the baby dinosaurs galloping in my stomach. I almost panicked as my head started to go below the surface, and even though i was tied safely to the boat by a long strong rope, it was scary.
But the moment i was below the water, it was like, a kind of peace stole over me. All voices from the world above ceased to exist. The base of the boat was a fuzzy shadow overhead. It was like being in a womb again, with my rope being the umbilical cord, and the ocean, the nourishing protecting liquid all around me. And as I slowly moved forward, lower and lower into that labyrinth, as the sun grew dimmer and dimmer, till it was no different from a pale moon out in some starless night, my fear grew lesser , and my safety completer. I felt free, free to explore, to see with my goggled eyes, a world that seemed more my own than the one I had left behind, to touch with my gloved hands, the sights more exotic than i had ever imagined. Suddenly I felt a slight ticklish feeling near my right leg. I quickly turned around, as the illusion broke and fear returned with full force. But it was only a school of beautiful tiny orange fish, that had brushed my leg. The safety had returned, but the fear remained, to mock me. I could feel the pressure of the sea mounting above me, I could hear the distant muffled roar of waves.
As it grew darker still, I switched on the light attached on my head, and it opened to me the mysteries that lay there quietly, or moved about swiftly. I saw long green grass like plants with huge slithery leaves to my left. To my right was a school of purple and silver fish, trying to get away from me and my intruding light, as quickly as possible. Below me I could see many an outcropping of rock, shaped into little caves. Strange bubbles were coming out of tiny openings in the rocks, accompanied by low rumblings, giving them the appearance of a huge monster sleeping and snoring away to glory.
A little to my front, I saw tiny sea horses, and a number of different creatures, of every shape, size and colour, I had ever imagined.

A little further on I could see the floor falling off steeply, like an undersea water-fall.
It was like a separate world here, with its own mountains, volcanoes, springs, rivers, ditches and what not.. only the atmosphere was water instead of air. And it was beautiful. The dim lighting gave it a soft romantic look and the semi-darkness blurred the shapes all around giving rise to new species in my mind. The moving water shaped and unshaped everything in its wake and gave the illusion of a universe in the making.

I was lost in the beauty of the moment, breathing in the solitude, tasting the bittersweet taste of freedom, testing myself under pressure, all the while, with a million different thoughts running through my head, like the billions of colourful fish, that zigzagged all around me like lightening, with a splash of colour.
Just when I thought i could live the rest of my life suspended in that living saline world of shadows, I felt a sharp pull on the rope, tied around my waste. That was it, time to rise from the womb and face the world outside. I felt dread at the very thought of it. How would i ever be able to face the chaos of the world above after having seen the dynamic order of this underworld? How could i survive the noise of a million voices when I had experienced the seductive silence hidden below a million roaring waves?

No! just let me be, let me lie in my comfort, in this soft rocking cradle, which was making me dizzy, putting me to sleep. I wanted to cut away the cord that held me to them and sink to the very depths of this kingdom of dreams. There was a sharper pull. I realized I had stopped moving up. They were pulling me out, they were forcing me to quit my sanctuary. I wanted to scream and struggle, but something deep and primitive within me stopped me from doing that. I knew I had to go out and fight it. It was in those moments, just before I hit the surface and rose out onto the boat, that I realized what a baby about to be born feels.. what fear, what reluctance, what sadness, and yet that something in us, more powerful than all these things, is there to make sure we come out into a world waiting for us to tumble head-first into it.
I collapsed onto the deck of the boat with exhaustion. It was not until I had come out, had I realized how much the sea had tired me, how it had sapped me, how it had robbed me of my sense of direction, of light, of my very senses
I recovered my strength and my senses, a couple of hours and a hearty meal later, but what I gained in those moments in that dreamy exotic land shall stay in my mind and heart for ever, the taste never to be lost, the touch never to be confused, the sights never to be forgotten and the silence never to be unheard.

PS: I have been to sea n number of times, but I have never gone diving, so this is a purely imaginative post, hence, forgive any discrepancies as to the actual experience. To be honest, a month back I watched a movie called "Bridge to Terabithia", in which this girl writes an essay about going scuba diving and gets the first prize describing it, without ever having gone scuba diving. This got me thinking and I wrote this, though my description and take on it is entirely different from her's.

PPS: I am going home for over a week for a vacation. So, won't be able to write any new posts over the next few days.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

flying without wings..


Today.. i was a big fat red balloon...
there i go rising higher and higher, tugging at my long loose string...
plunging low and then whistling back up with a big whoooshhhhh..

:wow:
now that was fun!!!

and what was that little tingle in my stomach.. was that just the gas which that little man, with tattered clothes and that big colorful tattered turban, filled me out with or was it that mysterious feeling they call happiness?

hmmm.. i don't know.. whatever it was.. it was making me literally float on the clouds with dreamy eyes and a light head(well i guess that is the usual state of 'head' for a big fat balloon :D but still.. it felt great :) )

I know all it would take is a tiny prick to send me swooshing off to an early death and if i survive that , then the air would just waltz out of me little by little and in a few days all that would be left of me would be a drab, shriveled out, dirty little piece of rubber..
but why spoil my bounce today by worrying about what i might be tomorrow eh?

so off i go again, dancing and dribbling...laughing away to glory as i swing my white string in a tango, with the wind drumming a steady beat.. carefree with my face lifted to the dizzying sun..
today i fly without wings..


PS: hey folks! Sorry for breaking my tradition of a post a day, but my net conn it seems was on a vacation (zonked out!! :( ).. but now i am back(hopefully) with a little parcel of my life and dreams each day.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

automatic :D


Hmmm... so what was I today...??

Today, I was a little black and yellow auto-rikshaw going down the bumpy road on my three sturdy wheels..

There i go scaring away all those big fat shiny cars in my way, with my grrrhhh grrrhhhh putt putt grrrrhhh putt grrhhhh...!!!
Did you see them squeal and run right out of the way..??
aaaah.. its some mighty roar i have, you see :D

And how could anyone have missed my royal black wings, as they billowed out on either side of me with each gust of wind, welcoming the icy cold wind inside, like a man invites a new breath into his body, to cleanse out the staleness left by the last

So off i went, roaming from dawn to dusk.. guzzling down the igniting tempting diesel, whenever my spirits were low.. going from one end of the city to the other..

Started off my day with the smelling stinking slums, with their open gutters and bumpy roads, with more potholes than asphalt on them. :sigh: What a pain in the axles they gave me :sigh:
And the kids in these areas... ufff the parents have neither the money to send them to school nor the time to look after them.. and all they do all day, is run from one end of the road to the other..
One of these little things almost came under me today.. thank God!! I had gotten new brakes a couple of days back.. else it would have been one kid less on that street, not that the rest would have remembered him for more than a week. But who is to blame them.. they are taught that life is tough and losses are just too regular a part of it, so they learn to live with them at a very young age..

Well, coming back to my excursions today..
So i somehow managed to get out of the slime of the city, without much slime on my shiny black bumpers, and headed towards the other end.. the road of malls, with its high rise buildings and multi-block malls, with neon displays and bright lights. Some of the buildings, i have heard, have something called flats, where men live. I have seen them sometimes, peeping out of the hanging tongues of their flats. I think i heard someone call these tongues balconies. Anyway, i zipped along, on the road, which was smooth as butter, competing with long sleek cars and fast gleaming bikes.. the best part of this road was, of course, that it had many many red lights which gave me ample rest and a chance to look at the beautiful flats on either side... but somehow these lights always made my customers very grumpy.. i don't understand why they don't appreciate the chance for a breather...

So just like this, i travelled the city, with the wind in my wings and a fire in my engine.. cruising along, taking my passengers a little further in the ride of their lives.

It was fun watching my shadow run behind me to catch up and to watch the road slide right under me, like life slides by never to be lived again it seems, only to be revisited the very next day, with some new passenger in the backseat and a new song playing on the FM...

PS: took this picture myself, of a moving auto from a moving car

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Cat in a Hat..


Today, i was a just a lazy cat.
I lay all day in my warm spot in the sun..
curled up into a comfortable ball..
snoring away to glory in my faded old hat.

yawning and napping.. stretching and mewing
sleepy.. but content..

I didn't even feel like running away from my adopted home.. which was a surprise, considering how bored and neglected i have been feeling lately.
My adopted human family is on vacation you see.. off to some place called Goa. From what i picked up from their conversations, its full of sand. My friend Agusto, who lives in the neighborhood dustbin and knows everything about everything, told me that sands are in some rough dry place called a desert, which is so hot that it gives you bubbling blisters on your skin and your fur just wilts... The very thought of it had me jumping out of my stripes...my adorable little bristles almost fell off with fright..
I wonder why anyone would want to go to a place like that for a vacation... :sigh: ...humans and their strange ideas. I almost ran away again, when i heard one of the human kittens fighting to take me along too. Thank God her parents refused.

Anyway, coming back to today, i had a glorious day , though had a bit of a low moment towards the evening as i missed out on my luscious bowl of evening milk, 'coz that double crossing minx of a maid has been stealing it for herself ever since the owners left.
Grrrhhhh.. i wish i could think of some way of getting her fired.. :x :x :x

But this little loss was more than made up for by the delicious leftover chilli-chicken Agusto stole for me from that big red brick house at the end of the alley.. yumm... i can still feel the tempting aroma and my taste buds are still doing ballet, thanks to that spicy tangy flavour.. it was almost sinful.. :sigh: :sigh:
Thank God for friends, otherwise that mean maid would have starved me to death already.

Anyway, i have shifted my hat under the old ambassador in the shed, which is my usual sleeping place in the winters, and the very thought of my warm tickly inviting bed is turning me drunk drowsy..
:yawn:
so off i go... goodnight..sleep tight.. don't let the bad dogs yipe :D :D :D

meow meow!!

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Green day


Today i was a grasshopper..
green as a leaf right after the first rain
roaming freely through the high high grass
in and out of its shadows... warmed by the gentle slivers of sun light that filtered through

raiding ant hills and tickling the little busybodies, teasing them with my antennae

jumping high and higher still.. climbing to the very tips of the shady blades

aaaah..basking in the winter sun at last...
the drugging doping sedating sun

so off i hopped to the huge red lily by the side of the wall.. lay on its velvety petals and dozed off in its welcoming embrace


i explored and wondered
dreamt and lived
touched and felt
smelled every scent
tasted the wilderness of my world
aaah today i gave freedom a heady kiss
the wild green hopper that i was today..

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Freeville...dreamville..


hello everybody!
and welcome to freeville
i have been running for ages

from people
from loneliness
from riots
from silence
from chains
from independence
from chores
from nothingness
from the past
from the future
from care
from indifference
from doubts
from knowledge
from the world

and more than anything else...

from myself

but now i am tired.. so here i am in my little bubble in cyberspace...my freeville... where i can be whatever i want to be.. do whatever i want to do and be wherever i want to be..

one place i won't have to run from
i hope this would at last help me fill the void that is me..

to many posts of freedom and wishes..
to living my dreams and burying my nightmares
to letting out the dreamer the desirer the traveler

to my blog!!!